Memphis, Tennessee.

No, not Elvis’ house. I’m actually not at all an Elvis fan, and have never been to Graceland. I used to work right around the corner and some minutes away, but never once gone and paid to get in.

I’m not sure I’m missing much. The annual crowd of Elvi that would descend upon downtown was enough for me.

But back to Memphis, Tennessee.

I remember when I applied to Teach For America in the fall of 2012, I got to the final round and as part of the steps before the final interview, I needed to select 10 regions and rank them.

I was a political science major, not a clue in the world what I wanted to do after TFA if I even got in, but knew that it was my best shot to avoid going back home and just living in that small South Georgia town forever. It was competitive, as the US was hopefully coming out of a recession. Needless to say a few things were running through my mind as I, and my friend Mo sat in the Georgia State library 2nd floor at the computers, running through all of the regions.

I of course listed Chicago, but not as my number one. Mo advocated for Hawaii, but I heard horror stories, and NYC was out of the question because of cost of living. Atlanta was a choice, but I had just lived there and wanted a change. Maybe to the demise of education in some states, some regions had a requirement to get a masters degree on your own dime, and well, others didn’t.

So needless to say CoL and a masters requirement (or lack there of) were priorities for me.

I think Mo just wanted to visit Hawaii.

So what did I list as my number one?

Memphis, TN.

So in November when I was headed home for Thanksgiving, was the day we got the notification. My school wasn’t a heavy recruiter like Tech, Emory, or UGA, so I honestly wasn’t expecting to get in, and friends and others also dampened the expectations too.

But I was accepted.

My mom’s reaction was “oh no,” because unfortunately Memphis gets a bad wrap for crime. My dad was excited because we have family there. That seemed to help my mom, and at the time Memphis was going through a sort of renaissance. I guess now known as gentrification, but it meant there was a lot of money coming into the city, eyes from around the country were focused on TN’s Race to the Top initiative, and it seemed like it would be a good first landing spot after college.

I was #MeantToBeMemphis as we Corps Members used to say and hashtag on all of our instagram posts.

And what can I say other than, I f*cking love that city.

I got my first real paycheck there. My first real on my own apartment. The opportunity to teach. (I wouldn’t even say I was remotely great). Spent time with family that I hadn’t seen in forever and got to know them as an adult vs when I was a child passing through. I got my Masters degree there. I made friends. Developed a love for a hobby that eventually took over my life (gladly). And yet, after two years I left.

I moved to Chicago and did the super big city scene for awhile. I would never say any of it was easy. In fact, that experience may have chewed me up and spit me out emotionally.

So where did I run after?

Memphis.

Always.

I had the opportunity to join a founding High School staff as an Operations Manager, I stuck around long enough, and I guess didn’t mess up that bad to make it as Director of High School Operations. Seeing the founding class grow up over four years, and through a pandemic, to graduation is probably one of my greatest honors of my entire life.

During my tenure there, I began social dancing again at The Rumba Room on Main Street, which eventually led to me performing on a team, traveling to Orlando and Atlanta for congresses, and eventually teaching classes at the Studio.

I was in a city with some of the best food in the MidSouth.

Both of my pets are from the streets of Memphis. Caspian I acquired in my second year of TFA, and Stitch during my second year in Memphis, PT.2.

I bought my first home, and suffered through what owning a home as a millennial was actually like, and honestly, it kind of sucks.

But nonetheless, it is my home still, and it’s where H came to visit, and just stayed during the pandemic and where our relationship took off, and I guess it came out pretty decently because I followed him across the world to Togo.

And super long story short, I made a promise to the then Junior class that I would come back for graduation. And I made sure to do so on my trip in the US.

I booked a stay at Canopy downtown, I likely wouldn’t stay there again. It was fine, but it just didn’t feel right. I paid $9 for two biscuits…. it was ridiculous.

I went dancing like old times, although this time I was severely out of breath and off my game. It happens, but I loved seeing my old stomping grounds and old friends which were really family.

I saw my blood family in town, we discussed the current state of affairs, and the future, just like old times.

I drove past my old house, and it was very weird.

And I saw those kids graduate at the Orpheum. I felt a sense of guilt. I don’t think I can fully explain why, but I’m not sure I was ready to let go of who I used to be when I went back to visit.

What I do know is that those kids are amazing, and I can’t wait to see what they do.

What I know now after having been back, is that Memphis will always be home.

It has that way of rubbing off on people.

Once I was at a networking event and this guy who was a friend of friends and was obviously wasted. He said something silly, but also in the time since has made more and more sense to me.

He said that to the Egyptians, Memphis was the stop in the afterlife you would make before heading to the final place. And that he saw Memphis, TN as that point, that it serves a purpose in your life for a moment, or years, or your entire life, but it’ll always mean something.

I laughed then, but I wholly believe that now.

Paul Simon once sang:

“And my traveling companions
Are ghosts and empty sockets
I’m looking at ghosts and empties
But I’ve reason to believe
We all will be received
In Graceland”

I guess we will see.

So until next time,

Carrie.